Posts By flohjoe

happy#154 – don‘t own your children

September 5th is a special day to me. It brought people to my life that made me who I am today and I want to dedicate this episode to them. Almost or temporarily losing these people it draw some conclusions that helped me ever since.
Most important to me was the realization that the closer I was to certain people, the more I expected from them. There have been times in my life that I even expected my loved ones to make up for my own mysery. What I couldn‘t find in my own life, I wanted them to add.
When they couldn‘t provide that, I mean… think about it, how should anybody else be able to create something in your life and therefor in your brain that you couldn‘t even create yourself?
You are the only on who can change anything in your life, because your thoughts, your words and your actions are the only things that you are in control of anyway. Furthermore that conclusion made me realize that I have no right to expect anything from anybody else. Neither am I entitled to make anyone be with me, nor can I own anyone. We are all free people.
Love people while they are around and let them go when they want to. Enjoy each moment as you will lose them sooner or later. Let hate and fear go and make room for love and gratitude. Life will pay back.

I love you my friend, I love you my son!

happy#153 – age is just a number

I don’t know how old you are, but I guess you are also getting older. Last winter I went on a couple of mountains with my split board and I was so unfit. I thought that I am just not a fit as I used to because I am getting older.But the truth is that there were people way older than me. They were maybe in their 70th and they were fitter that me.This spring and summer I picked up some exercise and well, I am much better in shape than this winter. I don’t feel that worn out anymore… although I am half a year older. I think that age is mainly in your head. The younger you think, the younger you act, the younger you feel.That is the real topic of todays episode. It is all about the story you tell yourself. It is about feeling the joy of a child and maintain that feeling and the positive story for all your life.

simplicity – an approach of a maximalist

I am a maximalist, that’s why I became a minimalist.
What? How does that make sense?
I think it does, although it took me more than 30 years to realize. As long as I can remember I could not get enough. It did not matter whether it was playing a game, a vacation I was on, a mountain I was hiking, stuff that I owned.
I just couldn’t get enough. I wanted more and got frustrated easily when I couldn’t get it.
I believe that a major reason for me to get frustrated was, that I never focused 100% on one thing. I could do everything in life, right? The older I grew the more I realized that I could also own everything that I was longing for.

others had it all

After all… I knew people who were coming from nowhere and who owned all the fancy stuff now.
What I didn’t see back then, is that they where paying a price for everything. A day has only 24 hours and each moment can only be spend on one thing at a time. So even if you have enough money to buy almost everything, you will have to take decisions to do either this or that with your time. Even owning a motorbike, a sportcar and a sailing boat, you can only use one at a time. The more you add to your possessions the more you have to limit your time for that.
Apart from that, most people I know had to earn their money somehow. When I had a closer look at the job they needed to do in the first place, it was nothing that I ever wanted to do. At least not for more than a week.

everything comes with a price

That is the problem about comparing yourself with others. Compare and dispair. You only see the result and not the work they put in the previous years. You also don’t see the unfulfilled dreams they secretly have.
Everything comes with a price. Maybe they are in a bad relationships, maybe they don’t see their kids, maybe they would love to have more time for themselves, maybe their success comes with the price of bad health.
Furthermore we tend to compare ourself mostly to multiple other people and see the different things they achieved, all of them coming with another price and each one of them lacking the others achievements.
Now one remains unhappy and feels unsuccessful as long as you don’t own everything that others do.
Well that is the perfect ingredient to become and remain unhappy for the rest of your life.
That’s what I did for the longest time. Looking back, I already did a lot of fun things, but kept focusing on what I did not have yet… and I felt miserable.

three steps

I came to I realized one day that three steps are important for me:

First:
I need to focus on myself. What do I really want? I mean really want. Next I needed to find out what was the underlying motivation of this and then prioritize for which one I want to go first. Sometimes I found out that I could satisfy the needs completely different or combine two or three of the needs with a different action.
Knowing what you really want, knowing your basic desires for happiness.

Second:
Stop doing things that you don’t want to do. Do things that help you be the one you want to be. Focus on your desires and prioritize. Work on the things you love most, first.

Third:
Compare myself to one person only: to myself yesterday! Comparing to others is the perfect way towards an unhappy life, no matter how much you own. If you know what you really want and who you want to be, check daily whether you are one step further today than you were yesterday. If you are not. Adjust.

Sooner that you think you will have changed your life 180°. Stay focused and thankful with what you already have and go on from there.
Because I wanted to have everything and couldn’t get enough of what I already had, I started to focus on what I wanted most. All of a sudden I became l much better and had more of what I desired most. Therefor I had go get rid of all the distractions in my life that where not helping me to fulfill my dream of living the life I love.

Minimizing helped me to maximize what I love most!

happy#152 – straight to the top, or not?

Chasing dreams and achieving goals is about knowing the straight way right? Without distraction and with a clear focus directly towards your personal summit?Well, knowing where you want to go is definitely a plus, but you might face obstacles or barriers that are impossible to overcome.There is no way to fight the wind when you’re on a sailing boat. It might be much smarter to adjust your course and trim the sails. What appears to be the wrong course might actually be the only way to reach your destination.What is true for trekking, hiking, climbing or sailing might have its expression in business or personal life as well.In case you struggle, you can take a step back and have a look at the broader picture to find out if there might be an easier route with a slightly different angle or approach.

happy#151 – no feedback, no development

We can’t learn, when we receive no feedback. We will at least never find out if our progress is going in the desired direction.We will loose contact to the base. Therefor is it so important to act, to actually do something and get our work and actions out there. Then we will receive feedback upon which we can react. Everything is connected and action causes a reaction and if we don’t listen to the feedback we won’t know which reaction we are provoking in the world.
In case you are interested in making the world a better place as I am, you might want to ask for feedback. Especially the feedback that you don’t like. The things that go wrong, the things where you face obstacles and where people don’t like what you are doing.
Then listen to it and take it as a hint what to do better in the future. Always compare it to the one you want to be. Does it bring you closer or further apart. And then act accordingly.

happy#150 – colin wright

My journey to declutter started in 2012. I reached a point where I didn’t thrive for more. At least not for more possessions. I wanted to have more joy, more laughter and more contentment.
I was looking for more meaning in my life. Through different blogs and writers I ended up with a person who had just taken a phenomenal decision and was traveling the world while writing: Colin Wright and his blog: Exile Lifestyle.Colin was talking about friends who called themselves “the minimalists“.
Yes, that’s right, those minimalist whom I referring to so often. I kept following all three of them throughout the last years and they have been a major influence for my own way.
By now, Colin is producing one of the best curated podcasts out there: Let’s Know Things. One of the few podcast, where I listen to each episode. Today I am thrilled to talk to Colin about life, minimalism and a vision for life.

happy#149 – letting go

Sometimes you need to let go in order to achieve something new. As odd as it seems, first look for something to give up…
So often it is mainly the distraction, the lack of focus that gets in our way of achieving something.
The day has 24 hours, that‘s it. The attention span lasts only so and so long. There are new studies that the average attention span keeps decreasing and went in 2018 is low as 8 seconds. And then… the next piece of information (or misinformation) catches our attention. Furthermore it is a matter of fact that the conscious brain can only do one thing at a time. Some people get quite good in switching back and for between two topics within miliseconds. Still they will never be as good and as effective as if they did one after another and paying full concentration to each one.
Letting go of what distracts you, of what annoys you, of what is just clutter, mental and physical gives you an enormous potential to achieve even more of what you are thriving for.
Are you looking for more joy, more laughter, more satisfaction and more happiness?
Find some of the opposites in your life and let them go.
You will be amazed.
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now it starts getting serious

I knew I want to travel the world. I knew I want to go sailing. I knew I want to go South.
I recently found out that I want to travel as light as possible… even on the water. I was looking for a boat that is as small as possible and still be safe enough to do some serious sailing. After my experience with Emma, our 45 year old Mercedes Camper Van, I knew I want to travel with a boat that is easy to maintain, wherever I am on this planet.

My dream was and is to turn the whole project into an experience worth sharing. I have already done some great journeys and the most amazing has always been to share it.
Fun, joy and love are some of the very few things that get more when you share them. When I was on my own, I struggled to enjoy the beautiful sunsets, the incredible mountain range or the endless ocean as much as I did when I was able to share it.

Therefor I am will document the whole journey on Patreon where you join me, starting at a buck per month. That is basically an espresso every other month and therefor you’ll be part of trip and you’ll receive exclusive content as well.
AND I am going to take people with me. That might be friends, customers or patrons. As I wanted to see if anyone is interested in that project at all, I started the kickstarter campaign three weeks ago, maybe you remember.
Actually it will be online for another roughly 15 hours when this is published and I am so happy that it is fully financed. Nevertheless, if you want to leave a € or two, you are more than welcome. There is also the possibility to purchase a week with me on the boat in 2019. CLICK HERE
I call it camping on the water, as it is a tiny boat compared to all the huge plastic boats you see around, but I can guarantee you, you‘ll have as much fun as you possibly can and it will be an experience of your life.

Are you on board?

happy#148 – how to grow confidence

I am faced every once in a while with the question wether I am not afraid to do some of the stuff that I am doing. And well… yes I am. Life is not about being afraid or not. It is much more about finding a way to do it nevertheless. Afterall, let’s face it. I don’t do anything special at all. It has all been done by numerous people before are are being done simultaneously. It is just special to me because I have never done it before.
As soon as you are in the situation where you are afraid, the fact that others have done it before, is nothing that will help you a lot though. It is and remains your life and your fear. Comparing yourself to others day in day out is one of the most efficient ways to get frustrated anyway.
If you want to thrive in life, compare yourself to yourself a day, a week or a year ago.
The difference between failure and success, whatever it will mean to you, is wether you are able to face your own insecurities and fears and find a way around or to overcome them.
If you want to turn a dream into a goal and want to start working on it do the following steps:
  1. Find a goal that is congruent with mind, body, soul!
  2. Educate yourself about it.
  3. Start implementing the new learnings. (maybe on similar projects where you need the same resources)
  4. Be patient and take mistakes as feedback.
  5. Keep learning all the way.
  6. Start before you think you are ready!
Good luck my friend.
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